In one of my psychology classes, we’ve been studying a section on how to pursue self-change. A student shared with me their insight that self-change begins with being aware of something in life they want to change and then taking small, regular steps toward improvement in that direction. They realized that, “it isn’t about trying to become an entirely new person because growth doesn’t happen instantly.”
Imagining how our lives could be much better (especially when compared to our impression of others’ lives) can be intimidating. It’s important to realize, though, that even the most authentically good life we see in another was likely a result of small changes sustained over many years.
In an effective self-change program, we can start with a clear vision for how our lives could look some years down the road. We then break that vision down into smaller, manageable steps that we can work on over a few weeks or months. As the student understood, this involves entering into a deliberate process of gradual change. We then stay focused primarily on the step in front of us and periodically look ahead at the vision to remind ourselves where we are headed. Small steps create frequent, small successes, which, in turn, build up our motivation and resilience to push through the occasional failures.
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